Some days walking with Jesus is more of a discipline than a desire.

September, near Presho, South Dakota

"I don't want to walk today. I'm tired and I don't want to walk today." I said the words out loud, but nobody was listening. A young pastor from a local congregation had just dropped me off on the side of the road and I didn't want to walk that day. Shortly after the pastor drove away I had walked into the only motel in town. Its red carpet was thread-bare and it smelled of rancid smoke, but I didn't care…I didn't want to walk that day.

As I laid my money for the room on the counter, I hesitated for a moment and then withdrew the fifty dollars. The desk clerk who had a cigarette burning in a nearby ashtray looked me up and down, "You want a room or not?" I stood there and soaked in the air conditioning. Funny thing, the smell of smoke wasn't as noticeable after you stood in it for awhile. I smiled, just like everything that's 'bad' for you. At first all the alarms and red flags go off, but after awhile you don't even hear them anymore. Sit in the smoke long enough and you don't even smell it.

"Hey Miss, you want a room?" I shook my head and turned to leave, "No, I've gotta walk today." The desk clerk mumbled a "hmmph" under her breath as I opened the door and walked back out into the light.

The whole earth was brown. I'm told South Dakota is always blanketed in an earth tone but it seemed especially dull that day. It didn’t help that the terrain was flat as far as the eye could see. Well not entirely flat, I could see a small rise in the road down about a mile or two. I decided to make that my first goal.

I'd like to tell you that walking for Jesus is a piece of cake, or even that everyday I experience something spectacular, but the reality is that there is a whole lot of earth tone in my walk with Jesus. Most of the days that I get up and walk are more about a decision than a desire, setting small goals to keep myself encouraged.

But there are those days, those days that God gives me a peek at the brilliant and the breathtaking. I won't make this a rule or anything. But I would say that most of those radical experiences happen after I've made the decision to walk in the earth tone world.

On this particular day, somewhere near Presho, South Dakota God broke into my brown world and put the spring back into my step. You know that small rise in the road…my first goal for the day? It took me about an hour to travel to that small rise. I worked for every step. I recall singing a few songs but mostly I just remember that I watched my feet…step….step…step.

As I came over that little ridge I closed my eyes and raised my head to embrace a small breeze that lifted the hair off my face. As I opened my eyes I gasped and then began to cry. Not a sad cry, but rather a hysterical, laughing sort of cry. There in front of me bloomed a billion sunflowers. As far as I could see, their smiling faces were lifted to the sun. I ran into the field and sat down amongst them. And as I swayed back and forth I felt like one of them. I must have been quite a sight from the interstate, sitting there swaying with the sunflowers, but I didn't care because I was embraced by pure joy. And on that day, the day I didn't want to walk, God broke in and changed my earth tone walk into something brilliant.

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